Dear Speak On It,
For five (5) years, I was madly in love with the father of my three (3) children. Things were perfect, until he decided to entered into the “pharmaceutical business” with a partner. I became extremely upset and bothered by his new “business” choice and to make things even worse, his business partner turned out to be a female. He claims, he partnered with her because she was already making a significant amount of money.
Their relationship became intimate. His excuse for sleeping with her was, “he had to do in order to keep her in line and to get all of the money.”
Due to his actions, I became unfaithful.
Well, you know how things go in the street, he ended up getting arrested. He was arrested on four (4) separate occasions and on the final arrest, he was sentenced to three (3) years in prison.
While he is in prison, he still wants us to be together. He’s constantly writing and calling me, questioning who am I with and trying to force me, to be faithful to him.
In my mind, he does not have the right to ask any questions, after he destroyed our family.
To add to the hurt which I have already endured, he tells me, that his “business partner,” was sentenced to fifteen (15) years in prison and now we can get married.
What Should I Do?
Dear What Should I Do,
The first thing you should do, is be offended. How dare he think you would want to marry him, because she is out of the picture. That comment is like a slap in the face.
Secondly, “street statistics” do show, that people will say anything when they are behind bars. People come out of prison claiming to be reborn, that they are a completely different person and ultimately, telling the significant other how faithful they are going to be.
Don’t get me wrong, many people do change. However there are some, who just need a listening ear, while they are locked down and once released from being incarcerated, they jump back out doing the same thing.
Finally, if you truly love him and want it to work, have a heart to heart with him. Let me know how deeply he hurt you and lay down some ground rules. Tell him what you will not put up with, cheating and selling drugs should be at the top of you list.
Food for thought: People in prison can’t dictate anything behind bars…
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